Eggs Benedict

“Morning, sleepyhead,” I laughed, as I placed a glass of water on the bedside cabinet.

Bleary-eyed, but as beautiful as ever, Benedict woke up slowly, a look of sheer confusion on his face. “Um... good morning?”

“How are you feeling?” I asked, unable to hide the amusement in my voice.

“Um... I'm okay. What's going on?”

“You remember coming over after work last night?”

“Yeah...”

“You fell asleep on the sofa, so I let you stay here.”

“Why don't I remember?”

“You were completely out of it, Ben.” I laughed gently, sitting on the edge of my bed. “You were so tired when you got here, that I'd only gone to get us some drinks and you'd dropped off in front of the TV.”

“I'm so sorry,” he muttered, taking a sip of the water I'd provided.

“Why are you apologising?!” I slapped his bare arm gently, realising once again how much I loved the feel of his skin against mine. “I should be the one saying sorry – I'm the one that insisted you come over last night.”

“Yeah,” he looked earnestly into my eyes, “as if I wouldn't have just shown up anyway! Hey, why am I in your bedroom?”

“Where else would you be?”

“In the living room! Or the spare room!”

“You were dead to the world, Ben,” I laughed, “so it was easier to get you in here than have to prop you against the wall to clean up the spare room first.”

“You shouldn't have given up your bed! I would have slept on the floor, if what you're saying is true.”

I laughed, gently moving some hair from his forehead. “Don't be silly.”

“Thank you,” he muttered.

I squeezed his hand and stood to leave, “Breakfast?”

“Please.”

“I'll see what I've got...” I flashed him a smile and waltzed out, grinning to myself.

Several minutes later, I heard my bedroom door opening, so I shouted, “Eggs, Benedict?”

His low, heart-stopping laugh sounded through my home, “You're an angel.”

“Is that a yes to Eggs Benedict, Benedict?” I returned the laugh.

“You know I'll eat anything, especially if it's already got my name on it,” he made his way to me, and pulled me into a gentle embrace. His cupid-bow lips softly touched upon the skin of my temple, before he twirled me away from him, and greedily eyed the ingredients I'd pulled out. “Need any help?”

“If you're willing?”

“Always,” he grinned sweetly, and grabbed the eggs and ham. “Also,” he seemed to be thinking aloud, more than talking to me, “I need to apologise again.”

I pointed my muffin-cutting knife at him jokingly, and glared playfully, “You need to stop being so damned polite, Mr! What could you possibly be sorry for now?”

He chuckled guiltily before looking at me seriously, “You called me here last night to tell me something, didn't you? And I fell asleep before you could, so I'm sorry!”

I felt blood rush to my cheeks as I remembered how determined I'd been the night before. Once and for all, I was going to tell Ben that I had feelings for him and that I hoped we could be more than friends, but when he'd fallen so soundly asleep, I hadn't had the heart to wake him. He looked far too adorable, and my resolve utterly drained from me.

“What did you want to say?” he continued to make breakfast, as I stood there, mind racing to make something up.

“Doesn't matter,” I smiled.

“Sounded pretty important yesterday,” he mused.

“I just wanted to see you, more than anything else,” I bumped my hip against his playfully.

“If you say so,” he laughed, brushing his elbow against my arm in retaliation.

After almost starting a full-blown food fight, we finally managed to scramble together some sort of breakfast, and settle ourselves in front of the TV.

“You know I'm going to annoy you until you tell me what was going on yesterday, don't you?” he asked, holding the remote captive so I'd listen to him.

“Honestly, it was nothing,” I assured, but lying was never a skill I could take pride in.

“You'll never be Oscar-nominated with a performance like that,” he teased, slapping the remote into my hand.

“Really, it doesn't matter,” I smiled, pressing the power button he could never find on the remote, then passing it back.

“Thank you,” he flicked through the channels, finding something I absolutely hated to watch, and putting it on loudly.

“Hey!” I complained.

“Tell me,” his eyes glinted mischievously.

“Benedict, you are an evil man,” I laughed, my heart banging loudly in my chest, my eyes searching his for a way out of this. I couldn't find one. “What time do you have to leave today?” I redirected the conversation, knowing it would only gain me a little time. Part of me would be glad if he could stay for a while, but the other part hoped that he had to leave immediately after I told him, so I could keep the pain and embarrassment of rejection to myself. I was sure that it would play out that way, but I'd decided the night before that I could, and would, no longer live with this secret. His blue eyes glinted as he looked at me, his smile now faded as he saw the seriousness on my face.

“Don't stall. Tell me,” he urged, worried now.

“It's nothing bad,” I started, “at least not yet.” He looked puzzled, but allowed me to continue. I picked at my food, as I tried to find the words. He muted the TV, and made every beat in my chest seem more prominent, each blink of my eyelids last a lifetime, and every breath feel like it could be my last one. I glanced at the door, but knew there was no getting away from this. I couldn't find the perfect words, so I just ran with the first thing that came to mind - “Please don't freak out and leave me...”

His face was gentle, yet intense. He half-smiled, and urged me with his eyes to carry on. “I've known you for a long time now, Ben, and I thought maybe it was just a phase, but it never went away. I mean, what woman in the world would be able to resist such a beautiful feeling, created by such a beautiful human being?” I paused, almost laughing at the confusion on his face, but I was too invested in this terror I'd created within myself to allow happiness now. “You're the best thing that ever happened to me, mister, and I don't ever want to think of a day where I don't at least get to talk to you, or hear you laugh. Benedict, all I'm trying to say is that even if you don't feel the same, please don't leave me. I need you in my life, and I guess that's just one symptom of loving someone, but I'll suppress the rest if I have to.”

I took a deep breath, and realised how little air I'd actually taken in during those last few sentences. Ben's face was unreadable.

“Did that make sense?” I laughed nervously, having no clue what I'd just said.

Silence dominated the next few moments, before he pleaded with his ocean eyes, “Can you break it down a little, please? A lot happened then, and I need to know I understood you.”

I took the slowest breath of my life, before simplifying it as best I could, “I love you, Ben. More than as a friend.”

Benedict's eyes closed for a moment, and he unknowingly steepled his hands beneath his chin as he thought. “You're serious?” he questioned quietly.

“I'm sorry,” I muttered, trying to keep myself from launching my body out of the window.

“Don't be,” he looked at me urgently, as though he could read my mind. “You've nothing to be sorry for. Ever.”

I smiled quickly, before my anxiety of the situation settled back. I watched his eyes move over my face, as he thought for what felt like an eternity.

“Ben?” my voice was barely audible.

“You know,” he spoke, but his face was blank, “I've suspected this for a while...”

I could feel my heart breaking.

“And honestly, I never thought the day would come... I mean, I certainly didn't think it would come about this way. It was so different in my head.”

“You can leave if you want to?” I asked, fighting back tears.

Again, he looked at me with importance, “No! Why would I leave?”

“It's okay,” I reassured both him and myself, “I understand.”

“I don't think you do, my angel. I don't think you do.” His head tilted to the side as he seemed to evaluate me for a little while, before he confidently placed his hand over mine and leaned in to kiss my forehead. “I never pictured today happening this way, because I always thought I'd be the one to finally get this out in the open. I'm so glad you're the brave one, because if it were up to me, I would never have had the chance to do this today.” And with that, he leaned over and placed a gentle, yet passionate kiss on my lips, before pulling my body closer to his, and kissing me more intensely than anything I'd ever known. I kissed back, love and relief flowing through my body like someone had injected happiness into my veins and it was reaching for every millimetre of me. I'd never known anything like it could even exist. I wrapped my arms around him, and felt him do the same, but something was wrong.

“Ben...” I whispered against his lips.

“Mm,” he moaned, smiling against mine.

“Ben...” I repeated after another stunning kiss.

He chuckled, and pecked my lips, as I tried once more, “Ben.” I giggled, “Eggs, Benedict.”

Both of us looked down at the same time, to find our breakfasts spilled all over our laps. In synch, we both burst into laughter, and brushed the food onto the floor. “I'll sort it later,” I smirked, before placing myself in his lap and saying, “But first...” and kissing him the way I'd always dreamt I would.

A Two Hug Problem

“Morning Sherlock,” I smiled, as I entered my flat. I'd been gone for over an hour, yet Shaun also known as Sherlock to his close friends, was stood exactly where I'd left him – staring at his problem wall. Whenever he had an issue with his work, he would take all the relevant papers, pictures, graphs etc., and pin them to the wall; hence his nickname.

“Morning,” his eyes flitted to me as I started to put my shopping away.

“Still struggling?”

“Evidently,” he replied, and the room fell quiet once more. I knew better than to interrupt Sherlock's thinking time. I always felt my talking to him was more of a hindrance than a help. I began to make tea; something I'd grown very accustomed to doing here, though I never drank it myself. As the kettle boiled, I surreptitiously looked over at Shaun. He was such an extraordinary person. I'd never met anyone that could be so invested in one train of thought. I'd never known anyone to be that passionate about anything. It didn't matter what he was doing really, because he put this much concentration into everything, from his work, to doing the dishes.

When the tea was ready, I warmed my winter-chilled fingers on his cup as I worked my way through his mess and carefully across the room. I moved a small table over to his side and placed the tea there. Straightening myself out, I looked over the problem wall and decided that I knew far too little about it to be able to help, at least until he was ready to talk about it. So I did my usual thing of being overly-friendly with my genius friend, and stood right in front of him. Luckily, being shorter than him meant that I was by no means in his way, as I decided to warm myself by sliding my hands between his jacket and shirt, and wrapping my arms around his waist. Being used to these displays of affection by now, Shaun lifted one arm and placed it gently around my back. I knew it probably didn't mean half as much to him as it did to me, but the feeling of being so close to him made me feel safe. It had been a long time since I resigned myself to not being noticed by him, so I rested my head on his chest and listened carefully to the beating of his heart. It always drummed harder when he was really interested in something, and this job seemed to have him completely engrossed. His breathing, however, was slow and intentional, like he had to concentrate on every in-breath and every out-breath. He seemed so controlled, and being pressed against his strong chest, listening to his body work, was like listening to a symphony. My thumb rubbed gently up and down against the back of his shirt, and I could feel his breathing change ever so slightly. He liked it. I moved my other fingers for a moment or two before beginning to pull away from him.

To me, each beat of Shaun's heart was so important that time would pass slowly for me to enjoy it, but from anyone else's perspective, only a moment or two would have passed in that hug. I tried to tear myself away from his body, but as my hands left the confines of his jacket, his arms pulled me straight back to him. Both of his arms wrapped around me like a blanket, as I leaned back to look into his face. His eyes darted down to meet mine, and he smiled quickly, before returning his attention to his wall.

“What's this?” I asked, more quietly than I'd intended.

Without breaking his stare at the wall, he breathed back, “It's a two-hug problem.”

I laughed almost silently, as I rested my head back on his chest, happy to stay there for as long as he wanted me to. After a warming minute, I felt him move, and my heart sank as I thought that it was over already, but then I felt the subtle touch of his lips on the top of my head, before he once again returned to his original stance. I heard the out-breath of a smile, and felt his heart-rate increase as I squeezed myself tighter against him and drew circles and lines with my fingers along his back, hoping the future would be filled with many more two-hug problems.